Let me create for you a picture of a day I lived not very long ago. My four children (ages six,five,two,and one) and I were gathered in our living room, the pellet stove burning, where the two oldest and I were worked on a giant M&M puzzle, the two year old dutifully worked on her Strawberry Shortcake puzzle, and the baby slept. I turned on one of my favorite music selections, Pachelbel Canon to be exact, and smelled the bread baking. I felt a deep compassion and love for my children at that instant. I watched their faces, each in turn, and wondered how closely the feelings I felt at that moment resembled our Father in Heavens feeling for His children. The two year old was making little headway with her puzzle so the five year old offered his assistance saying he was great at puzzles. The six year old agreed, complimenting his younger brother on his abilities. I felt peace, almost sacredness, in our home. At that instant, I thought I would never be able to show anything but kindness and love towards my children from that point on. My heart was turned toward Christ and I had hope for my children and a great desire to make my home a refuge from the world for them to grow up in and to return to time and time again.
I wish I could say this was the end of my story but it does not stop there. You see, the five year old stepped on a corner of the puzzle and this angered his brother who pushed him away. The five year old then kicked the puzzle sending pieces all over the room and a tumbling matched ensued. The telephone rang, the two year old got bumped and screamed, the baby woke up, and I tried to walk away from my children so I could hear the person on the telephone. They followed me - tattling, crying, or screaming. Next, I heard a loud pop. Did you know that eggs put on the stove to boil and then forgotten about, pop? Children think this is great. I no longer felt the peace that had moments ago enveloped me. I felt like repremanding and sending each child to a separate room. The baby had a messy diaper and it had leaked. As I worked to clean up that mess I was told by a very reliable source, my oldest, that another child of mine had dumped out the eight gallon bucket of wheat. As I went, yet, into another room I found the activities of the morning hours in Crayola marker on the walls and furniture. Blue mostly, with some green. I recognized the artistic abilities at once to match those of my delightful and busy two year old daughter.
That night after the children were in bed, I was left to ponder, how could my home which was filled with the spirit of the Lord be left void of the Spirit so suddenly? How could I make my home a place for the Spirit to dwell amongst all the chaos that seems so inevitable?
David O. Mackay said, “With all my heart I believe that the best place to prepare for eternal life is in the home.” These words carry great significance for me. I want to raise my children in a hone filled with the Spirit.
If you looked up temple in the Bible Dictionary, it would read, “Only the home can compare with the temple in sacredness.”
Paraphrasing Kristine Manwaring in a talk she gave titled, My Home as a Temple, I think of “sacred” when I think of temples. I picture dusted chandeliers, white couches, hushed voices, and kind and happy people going about the work for their ancestors. I would guess the work is always completed on schedule and it seems that everything done there is part of a significant plan. Homes, on the other hand, can be noisy, messy, disorganized and characterized by nothing but interruptions. Some household tasks may seem mundane and may leave a mother and father feeling overwhelmed or spent by the end of the day. Even in the quiet moments, I find myself singing the alphabet song, reading Nursery Rhymes or Amelia Bedelia, folding laundry, cleaning the kitchen, or playing Legos.
What part of the definition of sacred could apply to both the temple and the home, two places which often seem so opposite of each other?
When I looked up the word sacred in the dictionary, I read, “reverently dedicated to some person, purpose, or object.”
Considering this definition, I appreciate how a temple and a home are both sacred. As the temple is “reverently dedicated to some purpose” our homes can, in many ways, be reverently dedicated to that same purpose - to the establishing of eternal families.
In his General Conference address given April 1999, Elder Robert D. Hales said, “The key to strengthening our families is having the Spirit of the Lord come into our homes.” He then proceeded to list 34 different ways we can invite the Spirit of the Lord into our homes. Assuming you are interested in all 34 different ways to invite the Spirit of the Lord into our homes, again, the reference is, General Conference in April of 1999 and the talk is titled, “Strengthening Families: Our Sacred Duty.”
At the top of his list, Elder Hales said we must, “make our homes a safe place where each family member feels love and a sense of belonging. Realize that each child has varying gifts and abilities; each is an individual requiring special love and care.”
Throughout the rituals of the day, I can tell my children I love them as I encourage and uplift my child while we do homework together, while I clean up their vomit, while together we prepare their favorite meal, while I gently scrub their heads with shampoo in the bathtub, or as we hold hands making a long line as we cross the street. Boyd K. Packer stated in the October 1998 Conference, “Most of what I know about how our Father in Heaven really feels about us, His children, I have learned from the way I feel about my wife and my children and their children. This I have learned at home.”
Second on his list of ways to invite the Spirit of the Lord into the home, Elder Hales quoted Proverbs 15:1 which reads,
“a soft answer turneth away wrath.” Elder Hales then said, “When my sweetheart and I were sealed in the Salt Lake Temple, Elder Harold B. Lee gave us wise counsel: ‘When you raise your voice in anger, the Spirit departs from your home.’ We must never, out of anger, lock the door of our home or our heart to our children. Like the prodigal son, our children need to know that when they come to themselves they can turn to us for love and counsel.”
If unkind words can chase the Spirit from our homes, then no wonder the Spirit can vanish in an instant.
Another suggestion from Elder Hales, and my final thought, is prayer. Pray as a family everyday. Henry B. Eyering said in the 2004 April Conference, “The first, the middle, and the last thing to do is to pray.”
My sister is a student at Utah State University and she lives in an apartment with six girls, each of which bring different ideals of what makes a home. These ideals vary in music preference, cleanliness levels, relationship standards, appropriate speech, and entertainment. I asked her how she is able to invite the Spirit of the Lord into her home when there are certain things, things that are offensive to the Spirit, she cannot shut out. She answered, “I can always pray.”
As quickly as a hurtful remark or angry tone can chase away the Spirit, a sincere prayer can invite the Spirit in. Do we pray as we recognize the Spirit of the Lord withdrawing from our homes? Do our children know to pray when feeling which are not of God steal a place in their hearts and our homes?
Can our homes emulate sacredness? Even after a child discovers squirt guns and ketchup compliment each other? Yes, as the Spirit of the Lord dwells there. Can the Lord dwell in our homes? Even after two young boys engage in a peach war, dispensing of four boxes of freshly picked ammunition? Yes, as we love, uplift, and pray there. D&C 20: 77, in part, reads, “…and always remember Him and keep his commandments which he has given them; that they may always have his Spirit to be with them.” As we teach of Christ, personify Christ, and love Christ, His spirit can live within our hearts and within our homes.
Dirk the snowman is very kind. He wears his glasses everyday and he already knows how to read. He isn't afraid of dogs, his favorite color is white, his favorite vegetable is a carrot although he loves olives and snowball cookies, his favorite chore is shoveling snow, his favorite movie is Superman, his favorite book is Weather, and someday he hopes to travel by plane. He likes to play catch, hip-hop, and dress-up and he hopes to learn a foreign language. Three words that best describe him are polite, perceptive, and cold. Thank you, Dirk, for gracing us with your presence.
